Congratulations, Lou! SO pleased for you - keep us posted!!

Re: telemarketers. I swear I'm not making this up. I'm also a little embarrased to relate the story.

My wife is a leftover back-to-the-land-er, so we have a few free-range chickens. We also have lots of cats because we live at the crossroads of two stray cat highways. We had a screen door with a cat door in one of the lower panels. One hot summer day, the chickens, either because of seeking out the cooler inside temperatures or because they smelled cat food (which they love, like feathered piranahs), came through the cat door(first time) just as my wife got a telemarketing call.

The caller started his spiel, but my wife interrupted and said, "I'm sorry, but I have to get the chickens out of the kitchen!", accompanied by the background noise of the chickens squawking and cackling. The telemarketer hung up. I guess he figured "white trash bed & breakfast" was a poor sales prospect.

By the way, we did away with that cat door.

If the caller can't pronounce my name correctly (and people who don't personally know me rarely can), I tell them there's nobody here by that name and hang up! Works well!

I've used the same technique with a great deal of success.

Another interesting telemarketing story (I'm convinced this one was a scam):
Caller: Hi. You've been entered into a sweepstakes because of your preferred status as a cardholder of Visa, Mastercard, American Express, or Discover. Which of those cards do you have?
Me: Does it matter?
Caller: *click*

In reply to:

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I have six kids with nine years between them (3,4,5,6,7,12.) Does that count?

---

Absolutely! I'll be checking in with you in 10 years.

Ok, I know I'm a few days off, but *RANT* My tires were slashed on Friday and I was unable to get to work END RANT*

The best thing I have found to work with Telemarketers is speak a foreign language. BUT only ONE word. When I'm at my parents house( I don't get telemarketer calls at my home)I answer the phone with "Hola!" IF the telemarketer has not hung up as of yet, after everything the telemarketer says all I say is "Hola!" If the telemarketer does speak Spanish, I continue with just repeating "Hola!" to everything. It is really funny to hear them get frusturated, but its an even better show for my parents!

Congratulations on all the expectant mothers in the BOL family! How wonderful!!

But what do you do if the telemarketer does deliver their pitch in Spanish?

I just make them think that the only word in any language I know is "Hola!"

You should switch to repeating "Que?"

I need even more help now, we just found out we are having twins!!!!!!!!!

Congrats, congrats.

OMG OMG OMG!!! Congrats!!!!! That is really exciting news! Wow, from one to THREE in one fell swoop, you are going to have quite the family. Now to start researching those double strollers, eh?

Congrats!!!! Double everything!! How fun!

We should have a BOL baby shower for all of you! I love buying baby supplies/clothes!

Jerry Sienfeld had one of the best responses to a Telemarketer that I have seen and it works quite well...

When the TM calls and begins the pitch explain that you are busy but if they would give you their home number you would be more than glad to call them.

or -

Me: - Did you say your name was Jack?
Caller: - Yes
Me: - Well Jack, thanks for calling...today is your lucky day. I am with Encyclopedia Int'l and would just like to take a minute to go over some really great deals that I could give to you! All I need is your home phone # and a major credit card - (I usually don't get too far beyond this point )

I'm so happy for you. The first year is somewhat difficult but you will survive. The worst part of having twins is the expense of bying two of everything at the same time, especially when it's books for college. The best part is that when you're done with bottles and diapers, you're done. Good luck!

Congratulations, Jennifer!! I'm sure you'll have no problem with twins. After all, if you can work in this industry you can do anything! You're used to getting as much done with as little resources as possible AND doing it all at the same time

Thank you all for your kind words...more and more BOL just seems like a part of our family!
You will be my life support when I am trying to work from home with two babies and a 3 1/2 year old to care for.

I'm a twin and I can highly endorse the need for more duplicate humans in the world! Anyone who knows about my twin says immediately..."Oh my god two red heads in one family! Your mother must be a saint!"

Good for you Jennifer!!! Go make another set when this one is done...it will make the twin picnics just that much more fun! (sure you'll be gray in a week...but what the heck)

There or TWO of you!!
And what does he/she do? Maybe your twin can collaborate with you on that book. And don't forget that I want the first copy.

A Dawnie twin, can we take two? Is that why the Queen's favorite Reg is B B

I think one set of twins will be enough! Don't get me wrong we are very excited about the news, but this is one more child than we had intended. And we are now grappling with how we are going to afford daycare for three children!

It is so neat that you are a twin. Your family get togethers must be hilarious if your twin is anything like you!

I can't wait to see just how these two new lives are going to interact. They were kicking each other during the ultrasound. I think twins are so facinating!

I really should have a picture of myself out here because right now I have very dark brown hair and in 6 months I might be completely grey! JK

STAGE DIRECTION: The following line is to be read like a soap opera actor, with a horrific look on your face, while moving slowly backward away from Dawnie:

Now I know why you moved to Alaska...you...you...(shriek)...you're the evil twin, aren't you!?

A family had twin boys whose only resemblance to each other was their looks. If one felt it was too hot, the other thought it was too cold. If one said the TV was too loud, the other claimed the volume needed to be turned up. Opposite in every way, one was an eternal optimist, the other a doom & gloom pessimist.

Just to see what would happen, on the twins' birthday their father loaded the pessimist's room with every imaginable toy and game. The optimist's room he loaded with horse manure.

That night the father passed by the pessimist's room and found him sitting amid his new gifts crying bitterly.

"Why are you crying?" the father asked.

"Because my friends will be jealous, I'll have to read all these instructions before I can do anything with this stuff, I'll constantly need batteries, and my toys will eventually get broken." answered the pessimist twin.

Passing the optimist twin's room, the father found him dancing for joy in the pile of manure. "What are you so happy about?" he asked.

To which his optimist twin replied, "There's got to be a pony in here somewhere!"


Our Cashier is an identical twin. His brother works for the IRS. They have quite a time when he comes to town for visits. Congratulations!!

Sounds like a lot of married couples too!

Hi,
Sorry, I had to enjoy my Friday Frivolity today as I am leaving
for sunny Orlando Fl tomorrow... Here's the joke:
What's round on both sides and high in the middle?

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Answer: OHIO (that was courtesy of my 7 year old sun, Nick.