Because I have been out in the sun too long (and I'm a reformed bitter and rural BB).



My contract allows me to get a new phone every 2 years, and I want to get the enV. Should I get it tonight?

is 2 years up? Why don't you ask Debbie?

Yes my 2 year are up.

Should I ask Debbie to go fly a kite?

no, tell her to jump in the lake!

who is this Debbie anyway?

Probably not. They'll just think your slacking off.



Why can't I say no to women?

It's worth a shot.



Should I put my hand in my pants a la Al Bundy if we get auditors in our office asking for files?

as long as you make sure it's your hand and not Debbies'





You like her don't you?

I like her better when she's away. Kind of gets under my skin and thinks she's my boss when she's not and I've been here longer.


Does that make me petty?

not at all!


do you eat 3 meals a day?

sure, on a 'slow' day




is it wrong to change the code on my wife's garage door opener and then peak out the back window to see her frustration?

Don't really have an answer...sorry

Why is it so hard to get over certain things...and by things I mean people

Because your car frame is too low. Try taking it to the south side of town and get your car lifted. Running over people will be a breeze.


Who's going to remind me never to walk in BSAinFLA's neighborhood?

You don't need to worry BB - I wouldn't run you over because of the bacon grease that would be left on my bumper...that such a pain in the a$$ to clean up

IDK, but each person takes a piece out of our hearts, and we need something to fill that void

the world sucks sometimes no?

Yes...

Why is it always the ones who don't deserve it that get it all???

Hork!

Why do I get the funniest visual of BSA plowing my down in FLA and leaving an actual bacon grease splatter?!?!

Cause you have a VIVID imagination.....

Have you seen the stuff that goes on in BB's head????

Can't even begin to imagine what goes on in there

Weren't some of the episodes of the Twilight Zone stories that were taken directly from BBs head

yes, especially the more meaty ones

have you tried the new bacon burgers at Chili's?

I actually tried the mini burgers so I looked like I was aware of the foods I consumed. But, alas, I realized the one burger cut into 4 pieces wasn't as much fun as a frisbee sized burger with load of peppered bacon. I'll never make that mistake again.

Isn't this a great deal?

I went to the mall to get a new phone and the guy was actually a licensed dealer for Verizon. Nice enough, but tried to say if I pay $100 I'd get the phone I wanted plus a car charger and there was a $50 mail-in rebate. I instead went online, ordered the phone with next-day shipping (it'll arrive at my office Friday because it's too late tonight) for $29.99 plus tax. Skidoo, skidoo, the only thing that matters is with who you do. Skidoo, skiddo, the only thing that matters is with who.

Second question: Surely, you don't think mine is the most "creative" mind on BOL?

Don't know about creative, but definite;y the most amusing


Bacon - Are you strictly a Bacon Boy or will you also consume the occational sausage link or patty????

Bacon is as bacon does....






How bout a date?

Dooby! Shame on You!! - are you cheating on Kitten? (Q&A)